This is understandable when interactions with parents and family members were abusive, they have been taught not to trust. As a result of their lack of self-esteem they tend to choose dominant partners who are able to give their life purpose and meaning through association.They fear abandonment which is either real (such as the impending break up of a relationship) or imaginary e.g. They also undertake in behaviour that perpetuates their own abandonment.This can happen several times before the relationship finally ends.Being the partner of a Borderline can be a harrowing experience and inevitably partners have thoughts of leaving.They do not reinforce feelings of love, more often that not it just evokes guilt and pity.Borderlines tend to fall in love quickly, their relationships develop fast and may burn out just as fast.Just looking for similar experiences or insights into BPD in general. Borderlines do not know who they are and can spend a life time trying to find out.(I'm usually pretty knowledgeable about mental illness, but this is one of the most confusing/disturbing ones I've ever encountered). It's to the point where i have not said a word to either of them in a long time. This may be evidenced through numerous career changes, frequent moves to different geographical locations and attempts to fit in with others.
They feel overpowered by emptiness and not knowing who they are and become desperate to go back to their ex who largely defines their existence.Not going to give too many details, but I'm in love w/ someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder. She led me on for about a month before becoming girlfriends w/ someone w/ more money and now treats me like total crap. The best way to describe it is as an "emotional roller coaster" ride. They experience a variety of rapidly changing feelings.I know I should "move on, she's not worth it", which I'm trying to do. Their feelings of emptiness stem from the fact that they have a poor sense of self-esteem. ilived with my sis and mum all my life and still have no way of just living a normal life..them.
Borderlines lack trust in others and do not value themselves highly, as a result they tend to feel they are unworthy of love and that they will be let down by those close to them.
A Borderlines partner may do something that shows they are not perfect and the situation does a complete 180 degree turn.