Dating with herpes stories


On sites like Positive Singles and HMates, users are expected to be open about their diagnoses, but because they know everyone else there has an STD, too, it removes a huge barrier—and the question of whether the information will send a potential partner packing.“It’s a great way to see you’re still the same interesting, sexy, desirable person,” Davis says.“It helps rebuild the confidence that gets hammered down when you get that diagnosis.” (She is a spokesperson for Positive Singles, but she’s never used any STD-specific dating site.)Carlson, who got back into dating via this kind of site after her diagnosis, agrees.“After I felt more comfortable with myself and the situation, I went on Bumble and started dating people in the more conventional way,” she says.Some people put an incognito message in their profiles on general dating sites, writing out 437737—it spells “herpes” on a dial pad—in their profiles.



“I really wonder if it would have changed things to wait until we had connected more.”On the flip side, she’s also dated “quite a few guys who didn’t care at all” even though she told them ASAP.But all the self-acceptance in the world doesn’t erase the fact that a herpes diagnosis creates ripple effects of shame and social isolation, and the fallout is especially pronounced when it comes to your dating life.“It’s good to have the conversation because there is a potential risk of transmission,” Cherrell Triplett, M.D., an ob/gyn who practices at Southside OBGYN and Franciscan Alliance in Indianapolis, Indiana, tells SELF.This page gives straight-forward answers to many of the top several questions asked by the clients using

These questions will be kept as current as new information surfaces and clients’ needs change.

THE LETTERS THAT FOLLOW ARE SUMMARY QUESTIONS OF SOME OF THE MANY THOUSANDS OF QUESTIONS THAT HAVE BEEN SENT TO US OVER THE YEARS. Here are some suggestions provided by different organizations. You should know up front that although transmission of herpes is very unlikely unless there is actual close physical contact of a sexual nature, however the use of condoms and spermicides is NOT 100% effective in prevention, although they have been reported to reduce the risk.