Rodney dangerfield dating quotes
Every Sunday I take my family out for a push.""Boy what a hotel that was. ""I was so depressed that I decided to jump from the tenth floor. I used to go to orgies to eat the grapes." "When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.""I came from a real tough neighborhood.no days, just nights.""Last week, my tie caught on fire; some guy tried to put it out with an axe.""I met the surgeon general - he offered me a cigarette.""I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. ' He said, ' I don't know but your eyesight is perfect.'""Last week I told my psychiatrist, ' I keep thinking about suicide.' He told me from now on I have to pay in advance.""I'm at the age where I want two girls.My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.""My doctor told me to watch my drinking. And I drink too much, way too much; my doctor drew blood - he ran a tab! ' Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror... In case I fall asleep, they will have someone to talk to.""My sex life is terrible; my wife put a mirror over the dog's bed. She says she likes to watch herself laugh.""The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.""A girl phoned me the other day and said, ' Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over.I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.""My wife had her driver's test the other day. The other 2 guys jumped clear.""I asked him, ' Who said you could fool around with my wife? Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.""My wife's not too smart. She said, ' All kids smell that way.'""My wife has to be the worst cook. So he showed me a naked picture of my wife.""My wife has to be the worst cook.