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If the sexual assault has occurred within an emotionally intimate relationship, for example with a trusted adult, then it makes sense that when sex and intimacy come together later in life alarm bells can sound.An experience of childhood sexual abuse or sexual assault can impact on sexual relationships in the following ways: Most men are raised to believe that physical sexual arousal can only occur when there is sexual desire.The difficulties are often identified later, when engaging in sex within the context of a loving relationship.For some men, the experience of sexual assault can at times “play itself out” in the area of sex and intimacy.Some building blocks for satisfying sexual relationships are: Ever since the kids came along it seemed like we were not as close as we’d been before, especially in the bedroom.

It’s great when satisfying sex and sexual relationships just happen.Up until the 1960s, a man’s role was very much that of provider, ensuring that the family had a roof over their heads and food on the table. Given that sexual abuse involves unwanted sexual contact or inappropriate exposure, sex and sexually intimate relationships can easily become a place where difficulties might appear.Sometimes, men who have been sexually abused have been able to ‘do’ or ‘perform’ sex in a casual way in their teens or twenties.When one or both partners have experienced childhood sexual abuse or sexual assault, many couples have joyful, fulfilling, intimate sexual relationships.

An experience of sexual abuse does not automatically mean that sex, sexual intimacy and sexual enjoyment will be difficult.

We don’t talk about it much and we hardly ever have sex any more.