Speed dating bookclub


Tom and Patrick were both new-ish members of my book club, a group of about a dozen early-30-something gay men (and one or two straight women) who had just met the night before.Our club is pretty standard-issue — we send endless emails trying to get together, spend much of our time gossiping, and have rosé-fueled debates about whether Elena Ferrante could possibly be a man, or where the narrator of qualifies more as torture or interiors porn.But at book club, your intelligence and intellect are on display.It’s a different kind of mating dance.” Observing that romance will fly in a room of gay men is like discovering that water is wet, but the kind of attraction that blooms over discussion of a book is different than the kind that’s stirred at gay dodgeball or Metropolitan (or, yes, on Grindr).The only difference, of course, is that some of our members will probably have sex with each other.Like a good dinner party, what I’m calling “gay book club” has a few critical ingredients — gay friends who like each other but don’t see each other that regularly, a space that’s comfortable enough to accommodate a group of eight or more for book discussion and the requisite post-discussion noodling around, very free-flowing booze, and (this is key) a smattering of new faces to keep it interesting.In one meeting you learn the kind of information about a person — their values and capacity for empathy, or their ability to engage differing points of view — that would take at least three dinners.



“When I think of the cost of book club, there are a good amount of people in my life who probably wouldn’t be able to participate,” says Garrett.This one-of-a-kind event explores the science of attraction through a range of enticing sensory adventures.Sensory Speed Dating debuted in 2013, and has since been held at a raft of music festivals in the UK and the US, as well as venues in London and New York – including the Book Club, Queen of Hoxton, the House of Yes and Littlefield.“Between buying books, getting drinks afterward, and having a space to host — it all adds up.” If the whole thing sounds elitist, well, it is.

If you’re not into the idea of overeducated people who have expendable income and time to grouse about made-up stories, I wouldn’t suggest my book club.

The tension inherent in book-club discussion can be its own aphrodisiac, too.



Speed dating bookclub comments


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