The move to a new school is likely to mean your child being split up from not only individual friends they have had for a long time, but from established patterns of friendship, and from knowing how people are likely to behave.Remember how alone you felt in the school canteen when you were 11 and had just moved up to big school?Consistent with other adolescent relationship abuse studies, researchers found there was significant overlap between victimization and perpetration; 84 percent of victims also perpetrated abuse in a relationship.This finding has important implications for prevention and intervention; it serves as a reminder that programming should recognize the fluidity of these roles among youth in relationships.Once teens experience violence in one relationship, research has shown they are at significant risk for experiencing violence in another relationship.According to a study funded by the National Institute of Justice, 69 percent of youth age 12-18 who were either in a relationship or had been in the past year reported being a victim of teen dating violence.Remember, the abuse is never your fault, and asking for help is nothing to be ashamed of. Find healthy relationship and dating abuse handouts, resources, and more here.
But the first thing to realise, and to try to get across to your pre-teen, is that at some stage or another every other child feels like this, too.Some say they feel that where pre-teens appear to be interested in the opposite sex, it's more a figment of the parent's imagination and there's unlikely to be more than friendship at the root of it.Dating abuse (also known as dating violence, intimate partner violence, or relationship abuse) is a pattern of abusive behaviors -- usually a series of abusive behaviors over a course of time -- used to exert power and control over a dating partner.The seismic separation will happen down the line, when your children hit adolescence; right now, they're practising.
They're trying to work out how they'll be different from us, their parents, by watching teenagers, and figuring out that adolesecence is when you make the big break. Friendships are crucial to separating from parents - they give a child space to be different from their parents, and confidantes from outside their home with whom to share secrets and events.
Additionally, 63 percent of that same sample acknowledged perpetrating violence in a relationship.